Judgy Kitty is here to judge you. And you are found guilty and condemned to being a basement dwelling gamer!
nah imagine that was your clothing.
“hey i have been wearing my clothing for months(?) and recently they started to smell so bad that my gf complains about it. what do?”
“normally clothes shouldn’t stink like that as long as you follow proper hygiene routines. try showering more often, anon”
is clearly bullshit. stuff just starts smelling after a while, either wash it or (if you can’t wash it) throw it out and buy it anew.
worth considering to put a pillow on your chair, so in case it starts smelling, only that pillow smells and not the whole chair.
You’re naked against your clothing, but not against your chair. If something is making it through your clothing, that’s a problem and is not normal.
Oh come on now, we both know he’s sitting in that chair with his pants around his ankles more often than not.
Is this Asmongold
Can’t be. OP tries fixing something instead of whining
or king cobra, rip
Fellas is it gay to wash your own asshole in the shower?
Yes, get a friend to do it.
And make sure it’s a man, allowing a woman to touch your ass is gay.
Apparently it’s gay to pay too much attention to cleaning your ass in general.
I didn’t learn about this until my current partner told me she was so happy to see that I had a bidet the first time she came to my place. Apparently there are far too many men out there who actually truly believe that it is somehow ‘gay’ or otherwise ‘bad’ in their eyes to clean their own asses properly.
I dislike having to use the restroom while traveling because there’s almost never a bidet, and we got a bunch of dudes just running around out there choosing to have feces actively living in their cracks??? Still makes me shudder.
My partner showed me a short of a girl who went on a couple dates with a guy, and idk how it came up but the guy proudly proclaimed that “if you wipe it means you’re touching a man’s ass and that’s gay.”
After some back and forth the guy was like “I just met you and I’m not changing my entire personality just to please you.” And the girl said back “I’m not asking you to change your whole personality I’m just asking you to not smell like shit.” LOL.
There’s also a thing where dudes will shit their pants at work and be proud of it?? Then come home and make their wives wash it in the washing machine. Absolutely unhinged behavior.
Honestly, nobody ever told me growing up to wash my anus… i didnt even start until i was late 20s.
I hate bidets though, i just wipe very thorough and when i shower i get right up in there with lots of soap, at least once per day.
You guys like… Wash the inside ? I feel like I can’t do that as most of the time I hurt myself when I poop 🫣
😵💫 No. Nobody does. The hole should be closed while cleaning, but the balloon knot and the butt cheeks should be washed gently with a mild soap.
Yeah that I do
No no no dont go inside with the soap. Just the doorway at the bottom of the crevice.
Also if it always hurts when you poo, you should see a doctor
I often get constipated for a couple days and when it comes out it’s too big for the door
eat more fiber
Im trying
If your feces is alive then I think you’ve got some other problems…
Well then I’m afraid to tell you. Feces is mostly alive.
It’s absolutely not mostly alive. I’m getting contradictory numbers, some say up to 55%, whereas encyclopedia Britannica says 30% of your feces by weight, and a huge proportion of those are dead. But regardless, your intestinal flora that lives on and feasts on your poop, and some of which gets excreted with your poop, is not the poop itself. I was mostly just making a joke, but your poop itself should not be alive. That’s like saying the planet earth is alive because it has trillions of living organisms on it.
Alive by what standards?
It’s a seething mass of bacteria in a feeding frenzy, does that count?
Would probably have fewer problems with smell, waste management, etc if it weren’t alive
I worked with a guy that did believe that. as he believed getting a good wipe in there with TP was also gay.
one of the blue collar guys was trying to explain how bidets are better because with TP you’re just smearing it all around and to just like think about it, but nope that’s gay
Just how does someone like this, who doesnt even understand personal hygiene, even find a girlfriend?
It must be a bad smell when even Inflatable Ingrid complains about it.
In 2026?
OpenAI provides the GF.
In 3026, maybe she just can’t smell. 🤷♂️
I’m so happy Maryanne came back in the most recent season. It’s a nice contrast to have someone be nice to Zoidberg.
How long can “she” remain your girlfriend before the context window shifts?
They don’t. They just casually drop the word “girlfriend” into a conversation to try and prove that they’re not an incel.
Of course, I’m making some major assumptions here, but I stand by them all.
Nah I have a stinky cousin that has always done well with ladies. I was baffled when he was 15 dating cheerleaders and hanging out every night near my friend circle.
Literally he only wore black socks which made his feet and shoes smell worse, and he was covered in the most acne I had ever seen on a person because he wouldn’t shower but maybe 2 times a week. His room smelled like cum, he smelled like cum, he didn’t use deodorant much, wore only basketball shorts and tee shirts. He basically collected the dishes from the house in his room and his room looked like he was meant for hoarders.
He has always had a girlfriend or several.
i think this might be a case of the “nonthreatening toyboy”. girls will routinely pick out the least serious boy in the room to be their “boyfriend” for fun.
or maybe the absurdity of the situation just fried their brain’s circuit breakers. (you can see this sometime when an extremely unfavorable trait that is toxic in low doses suddenly makes you successful in extremely high dosages. just look at trump. no sane person could behave like that and get away with it. yet, if it’s concentrated enough, it somehow seems to stack and snowball.)
Maybe he is just a sweet Person, Hygiene aside
Youre right he was a very sweet guy, and his mom had back problems, he always helped her with everything.
At least it doesnt make sense that they want to get the bad smell off if they are kind of person who would have their chair smell like that. But I suppose they might also have friends that have complained about it.
People ¿Do you all know that both mice and rats poop?
Telling a gamer to clean their ass is like telling a dog to stop licking its own balls. SMH my head, let’s work together to end gamerphobia.
I’d like to stay and chat, but I have to go call my government issued transgender girlfriend slurs now. ttyl to you all later
what is wrong with licking your own balls? I wash them everyday
Doesn’t count if you wash them with your tongue
thank you for your service
“Gaming chairs” are cheap garbage. Just throw it away and buy a proper, ergonomic chair.
Bonus: If it’s one of the mesh types, there’s barely anything to absorb the smell of your shitty ass!
…and get a bidet already! Pro tip: The type of bidet that is integrated into the seat is vastly superior to the type that slips under the seat.
Hmm, explain why someone should throw away their 150€ gaming chair in order to buy a 600€ office chair?
Hah! How about this: So they don’t end up injuring themselves.
There’s a reason why ergonomic chairs exist and why they all follow the same exact design rules (to varying degrees).
Most important features, in order of importance:
- Adjustable arm wrests. Height is more important than swinging out/in. The out/in feature is more for convenience of getting them out of the way on occasion than anything to do with ergonomics.
- Adjustable height. The base of which all ergonomic chairs were developed.
- Adjustable lean. Meaning: You can control how far back it tilts.
Also important: Men and women have different ergonomic requirements! A woman’s spine is curved and should not have the chair configured the same as a man.
Everyone’s spine curves. It is just more pronounced in women because of their other curves. If you don’t have lumber curve, you’ve got scoliosis.
I mean at the base of the spine. Also, women’s ischial tuberosities are farther apart and the weight distribution is completely different. This means that ideal ergonomics for women require narrower, contoured upper back rests as well as a lumbar pad due to that deeper, inward curve at the base of the spine.
Hence why ergonomic chairs are so configurable.
My hospital bill for back pain so severe I couldn’t even move cost way more than the cost of the chair with proper lumbar support I subsequently bought. That was caused by a cheap executive chair, not gamer chair, though.
The lifetime of the product. I bought an ergonomic chair back in 2016 and it’s as good today as it was then. Any gaming chair I’ve bought never lasts more that 3 years. Spend €600 once or spend €150 every three years. In two more years my chair will be the same cost as having gaming chairs and in three it’s cheaper. Much larger upfront cost though.
All of my desk chairs across my house are 50+ year old office chairs. If your chair budget isn’t massive look for old office chairs, especially from government surplus auctions and the like. Mine were all gotten for free when workplaces happened to be replacing some furniture, but I also regularly see local schools listing office chairs in surplus auctions
Yes! Pro-tip: If you see an aeron chair on the side of the road for trash pickup, take it!
99% of the time, when people throw out office chairs it’s because the gas cylinder failed (gets stuck down). A new cylinder is only $20!
Just be prepared to whack TF out of that old one to get it out, haha. They can be really stuck in there after 5-10 years of people sitting on the chair.
Don’t be afraid to use a huge ass plumbing wrench and scratch TF out of the old one 👍
Have a search for “Chair cylinder removal tool” for another $5-10 it’s a matter of turning a few allen bolts to get the cylinder out and not risking damaging everything.
Bonus, mine has made its money back from mates dropping me a few quid to replace their gas struts.
I’ve broken several office chairs within a year of getting them just by sitting on them. I don’t trust them at all. My current gamer chair is a partially broken, vintage, wooden dining chair I got for free and I’ve had it for a few years now it’s held up great. Wood is the way to go imo.
I feel really bad for your back and body in general. There’s no way you spend a lot of hours each day in a chair like that without major issues.
It’s not perfect but it’s not terrible either. There was a point in time where I was sleeping on the floor for a while too so I’m kinda just used to having back pain all the time.
You need to get like actual decent office chairs, not Amazon trash.
They cost over thousand dollars new, but you can often get them for next to nothing when companies get new equipment.
Once I was in a store that sold used office furniture. The sales floor/warehouse was dingy, uninviting, and poorly organized, but the deals were INSANE. Desperate landlords will give furniture away rather than pay to have it taken to a dump.
Never been a clearer case of “get a fucking bidet”
Yeah but that’s not gonna fix a decade of farting and sweating on it.
Neither is “I tried wet wipes and literally nothing else”. Dude needs an education in how to clean everything, not just his ass.
A brand new chair is definitely a must, combined with the bidet
why not a combo 2 in one?
No one is teaching these men how to not shit themselves? Is wiping really alien to people? How do they not get diaper rash?
They genuinely believe wiping their ass makes them gay since they are technically touching a man’s butthole. Don’t ask them about bidets either.
I worked with not one, but two people who left skid marks on the toilet seats of both the men’s and women’s bathrooms. I can’t count the number of times I flipped out about it because I was always the one to clean it, literally wiping other people’s asses. I would’ve said “fuck it” and just left the shop to use the bathroom at the gas station and let them wallow in their own filth, except it was embarrassing as hell to let customers use the bathrooms, especially since I was typically the only one at the sales counter.
I complained over and over again to my boss, who finally started writing them up for it, but it was a worthless company that never followed up on that stuff. Eventually one of them was transferred out and fired over some other incompetence, but the other was still there shitting on the seat when I eventually got fed up with those people and quit.
I hated quitting the job, but it’s satisfying to know that it’s not my problem anymore.
i think some people you mentioned likely are only wiping when they standup, and not while they are sitting on the toilet, so thier “ass still having poo get smeared on the seats” as they slide on the toilet seat.
Who slides their ass on the toilet seat at all though? I don’t think my asshole has ever once touched the toilet seat and I think I’d get freaked out if it did. It’d be such a gross feeling like if your tip dips in the toilet water when you sit down or if it touches the seat.
… Are you shoving your hand between your butt and the toilet seat to wipe?
Standing up does not require sliding on the toilet seat.
On a serious note though, if the person can’t take it all with paper alone, or it takes a massive chunk of the paper roll, showering instead of using paper should help. And if the person is with the intestine disregulated, like for lack of sleep, stress, illness, etc., while the source of the issue isn’t fixed, showering more times throughout the day should also help, even if just washing the netherside.
I used to live with someone and it seemed like paper would vanish pretty quickly. During the VID, I asked them to help find TP, which they didn’t help with for a while, then eventually picked up a 4pk of the worst paper I’ve ever seen.
I found a pack of my own paper, and I floated the idea to my partner: if we wanted to know how much was being used, we could just use exclusively our paper and never the stuff in the restroom. I felt like a crazy person floating the experiment, but I had to know. My partner laughed and said they were totally on board.
My findings: This roommate was going through a half to an ENTIRE ROLL of paper DAILY. Like, he eventually found full rolls of nicer paper. I’ve never imagined someone going through a roll of ultra super whatever in a single day, from shitting and only shitting.
He moved out and we got a bidet. I use four squares on a normal day, and up to ten squares if I’m pooping five or six times.
up to ten squares if I’m pooping five or six times.
Wait. Pooping five or six times in one day?
Oh absolutely! Normally I only do like two, though.
So was it a partner, or roommate?
I have timed my body to need to shit just before I take a shower, so when im done I just pinch my cheeks together and waddle into the shower and rinse off my ass
I used to do this, until I got a bidet
Throw in the synergistic combination of morbid obesity, horrid diet, and depression/anxiety.
the OOP said it smelled like poo, so he mustve had skidmarks on the chair, or the poo is somehow getting on the chair,
Also baby wipes are extremely effective for those with hairy bums, and unscented baby wipes are going to be way cheaper than camo styled tactical “man wipes” obviously it’s more wasteful than a bidet, but if it works it works
Every body is different, but if you have trouble with appropriate butt cleanliness, it may take a combination of things to achieve cleanliness
They are not flushable, the packaging lies.
This is correct, baby wipes and similar are not flushable. The packaging does helpfully say in multiple places not to flush them
There are ones claiming to be flushable, and those are lying.
i dont believe baby wipes were ever flushable, it even says on thier packaging for most brands.
My
girlfriendmomWhy not both? /j
Real question though.
My black cloth chair has all these stains. Sometimes I can scratch them off or I find licking a paper towel and rubbing it out helps a little. Any other advice on how to get these white stains out?
Also if you have similar advice for a keyboard, mouse, screen, underside of a desk, wall, ceiling, carpet, and my glasses. Much appreciated.
Your comment reads like a joke, but since you’re saying it’s a real question I’ll bite:
For soft surfaces like carpet, couch cushions, etc. carpet shampoo can be very effective. Basically vaccuum, then squirt it on the surface, brush it with a carpet brush and let it air dry, then once it’s dry vacuum again. For food stains, try to clean it up before it dries. As soon as it happens, wipe it up with a paper towel, wet the paper towel with water as needed, or better yet, avoid the risk altogether and don’t eat at your computer. There’s a surprisingly massive gain in quality of life by having an actual table to eat at in your home, even if your meals aren’t particularly fancy or planned.
Hard surfaces will vary depending on the material, but it’s hard to beat wiping (and scrubbing as needed) with bleach water. Smaller items like computer peripherals may be cleaned with either a damp paper towel or Clorox wipes, or for a really deep clean take it to the sink and scrub it with water and dish soap (just make sure there is no power sources for 48-72 hours and it fully dries before applying power again)
Edit to add: for really stuck on grime on items that can be submerged, soaking in hot water with a dash of vinegar can be very effective. Or if you need some chemical assistance throw some baking soda on it, pour some vinegar on said baking soda then scrub with hot vinegar water.
A tiny dab of dish soap and hot water on a paper towel has gotten out every stain I’ve ever had on an absorbent surface, especially if you get to it while it’s still wet. Food, drinks, blood, bodily fluids, coconut oil, eyeliner/lipstick/makeup. Literally never come across something that can’t be gotten out with a spot cleaning of dish soap and then laundry if possible. Don’t use too much though, especially if it’s carpet or something that can’t be washed, as a little goes a long way and it can be tough to rinse out of something stationary like carpet or furniture if you use too much.
Fuck Reddit and Fuck Spez.
G*mers
